Archived posts

Review

I Am Not A Serial Killer

Posted: August 1, 2009 by Alan in Books We Love Meta: Dan Wells, Horror, Young Adult
I Am Not A Serial Killer

Dan Wells has crafted something extraordinary with his first novel, I AM NOT A SERIAL KILLER (Amazon). Our opinions are obviously superior to the rest, so you should believe us without question.

John Wayne Cleaver is the protagonist of the book, and as you find out very early on, he isn’t your average teenager. His troubles go much deeper than most, and are much more serious. You see, he worries that he might become a serial killer. He has all the tendencies of a sociopath, and he is very aware of how dangerous they are.
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Review

The Blade Itself

The Blade Itself

Welcome to another completely superior review by us guys here at Elitist Book Reviews. The chosen book this time around is THE BLADE ITSELF by Joe Abercrombie (Amazon).

THE BLADE ITSELF is a refreshing first novel in what we would call a dark fantasy trilogy. Abercrombie gives us a cast of characters that that have even more attitude than we do–no easy feat. Included in this cast we have a crippled torturer as a main character. Tell us, how often do we get to see a torturer as a main PoV in epic fantasy now days?

Awesome.
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Review

The City and The City

The City and The City

Read on for our completely incredible opinions on THE CITY AND THE CITY by China Miéville (Amazon).

China Miéville is an author who doesn’t settle for one genre. He has sampled many, many different genres, and somehow manages to give them each a unique creative style all their own. While many might argue what genre to lock Mr. Miéville in, we at Elitist Book Reviews think he is nearly as awesome as we are and doesn’t need to be bound to a single style.

While THE CITY AND THE CITY is a fairly large departure from his previous works, Mieville blends the familiar and the unknown together to create a believable mystery. The protagonist, Tyador Borlú, loves his city and country of Beszel, and works there as a police inspector.
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Review

Warbreaker

Posted: August 3, 2009 by Steven in Books We Like Meta: Brandon Sanderson, Epic Fantasy
Warbreaker

There is this guy named Brandon Sanderson, and if you read fantasy with any regularity, you know who he is. If you don’t know who he is, you should really read more. Seriously. Not only is he the talent in epic fantasy, he is finishing the WHEEL OF TIME for the late Robert Jordan. Sanderson is a gifted author, and WARBREAKER (Amazon), his newest novel, shows why.

Color (as in dyes, etc) is power. A person’s breath let’s them breathe life to inanimate objects. A talking sword that begs to kill things. Sound like an intriguing magic system? It should. Sanderson has made quite a name for himself by inventing unique and enjoyable magic systems. WARBREAKER essentially starts with the wrong, untrained daughter of a king being sent to another country to prevent a war from breaking. A great start to a great novel.
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Review

The Vondish Ambassador

Posted: August 4, 2009 by Alan in Books We Like Meta: Lawrence Watt-Evans, Fantasy
The Vondish Ambassador

Unlike Rome, the Empire of Vond was built in a day—well, nearly—as the Warlock Vond conquered countless smaller kingdoms, shocking the known world of Ethshar. Until he stopped suddenly and disappeared, that is. Emmis, a lone dockworker finds himself hired as the Empire’s Ambassador… suddenly caught in the political intrigue, mystery of Vond’s power, and schemes of vengeance that go with the job.

Lawrence Watt-Evans doesn’t get the notice and praise he deserves. Readers often know him from his recent ANNALS OF THE CHOSEN (Amazon) trilogy, though many readers don’t know him at all. If you are included in the latter category, we pity you. To understand the beauty of THE VONDISH AMBASSADOR, one first needs to understand the beauty of Watt-Evan’s Ethshar series, and his writing.
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Review

Twilight (Seriously!)

Twilight (Seriously!)

What’s this? Two reviews in one day? Well this one was a special request from some fans, and we were more than happy to oblige.

It’s time we shared the hate…

There are few things in life that we don’t understand. Why do people clip their finger and toe-nails in public? Why are Utah drivers incapable of using their turn signal? Why do people think Megan Fox can actually act? But mostly, we don’t understand ONE MAJOR THING:

When ON EARTH did sparkles on a VAMPIRE become cool? We just each threw up a little. Steve more than a little actually. It was gross. It was like an emetic taste test here.
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Review

The Twilight Herald

Posted: August 5, 2009 by Alan in Books We Love Meta: Tom Lloyd, Epic Fantasy
The Twilight Herald

Don’t worry. Despite having the word Twilight in the title, THE TWILIGHT HERALD (Amazon) is nothing like the book in our last review, TWILIGHT (EBR Review). This is Tom Lloyd‘s second entry in his Twilight Reign series, and it is much grander is scope and larger in size than the opening book, THE STORMCALLER (Amazon).

In a word (and you only need one from us): AWESOME.

Tom Lloyd is a newcomer, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have what it takes to blow us away with his story telling. He has managed to create a believable, original setting using the familiar fantasy tropes and bending or breaking them to his will. Populating his enormous, top-notch world is an exponentially growing list of characters, most of whom are distinct and interesting.
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Review

Turn Coat

Posted: August 6, 2009 by Alan in Books that are Mediocre Meta: Jim Butcher, Urban Fantasy
Turn Coat

It is with irony that we, the superheroes of book reviews, feel betrayed by Jim Butcher‘s latest Dresden Files novel, TURN COAT (Amazon). We debated long over what we should say in regards to this novel, and more importantly, this series. How about a history lesson? No?

Too bad.

Back when Steve “used to be important” (sorry, inside joke) at the bookstore, one of his regular customers said he wouldn’t read another recommendation until Steve read the Dresden Files series by Jim Butcher. There were only seven books out in the series at the time. Steve read them, and thought they were great fun. He, in turn, forced his superior attitudes on Nick and Rob. They concurred as to the overall awesomeness of Harry Dresden, the Wizard P.I. in Chicago (it just sounds awesome huh?). Books 8 (Amazon) and 9 (Amazon) were released, and we figured we had found the golden series. Book 10 (Amazon) came out, and though it felt like nothing but pure setup for the rest of the series, we forgave Butcher. After all, Butcher wouldn’t betray us right? He wouldn’t turn on us would he?
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Review

The Graveyard Book

Posted: August 7, 2009 by Alan in Books We Like Meta: Neil Gaiman, Middle Grade, Urban Fantasy
The Graveyard Book

Lest you dear readers feel we have a prejudice against novels that are written for young adults or children, we are here today to prove you wrong.

Neil Gaiman‘s THE GRAVEYARD BOOK (Amazon) is a prime example of a brilliantly written children’s book. Granted, as a children’s book it’s a simpler read, and in many ways not as beautifully complex as the anvil sized tomes we prefer. But some of the most brilliant and enjoyable things in the world are easy and simple (bashing on TWILIGHT for example is the easiest, simplest thing in the world–and yet both enjoyable, and a mark of intelligence).

In addition, while THE GRAVEYARD BOOK is a simple read, it is by no means simple.
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Review

The Judging Eye

Posted: August 10, 2009 by Alan in Books that are Mediocre Meta: R. Scott Bakker, Dark Fantasy
The Judging Eye

It was hard to approach this book without wetting our pants (Amazon) in excitement. R. Scott Bakker is Nick’s favorite author, by far, and owes Steve for introducing him to The Prince of Nothing series.

After reading the book a number of times we have decided how we can proceed on this review. We will make a concession right here and now. As much as we’d like to, it is completely impossible to review this book without comparing it to Bakker’s earlier trilogy set 20 years prior to the events in, this, the beginning of his second trilogy.
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